Asking for Referrals:  “I Trust Your Opinion”

by | Apr 15, 2026

I was recently talking with one of my favorite hiring managers, and he told me about an interaction he recently had with an experienced agent recruiting prospect.

The prospect had previously worked in his office and defected to a competitor.

During a phone conversation with the prospect, he asked for some help.

If you ever come across someone who would benefit from what we offer, would you be willing to refer them to me?

You know what kind of people I’m looking for, and I trust your opinion.

This interaction is packed with excellent recruiting execution. Here are some things to note:

He stays in contact with agents who have left his office.

“Boomerang hires” are invaluable because they demonstrate to others in your office that the grass is not greener somewhere else.

He asks his competitors for referrals.

It’s surprising, but competitors will often give you referrals if they have a clear vision of the value you provide.

He builds trust by acknowledging the trustworthiness of the other person.

This is a great way to honor the relationship and lay the groundwork for future interactions.

After hearing “I trust your opinion,” the prospect felt safe enough to engage in additional conversation for the next 30 minutes.

The best recruiting conversations are built on trust and mutual respect.

Showing and acknowledging that trust is often the catalyst for making these conversations happen.

 

The Simple Psychology of Real Estate Recruiting [2nd Edition]

Unlock the secrets of effective real estate recruiting. Revised to include actionable frameworks for sharper execution and to help you turn psychological theory into a repeatable recruiting system.

The Attrition Constants

The Attrition Constants

If you’re not focusing most of your retention effort on these issues, you’ll miss the mark. If you’re not focusing most of your recruiting effort on exploiting these weaknesses among your competitors, you’re missing the best opportunities.

The Persistence Mindset

The Persistence Mindset

A leader equipped with this mindset can have a profound effect on the life and career of each individual they engage. It works because an agent is getting a real-time glimpse of what it would be like to work on your team. But it only becomes believable when it is persistently applied over time.