Asking for Referrals:  “I Trust Your Opinion”

by | Apr 15, 2026

I was recently talking with one of my favorite hiring managers, and he told me about an interaction he recently had with an experienced agent recruiting prospect.

The prospect had previously worked in his office and defected to a competitor.

During a phone conversation with the prospect, he asked for some help.

If you ever come across someone who would benefit from what we offer, would you be willing to refer them to me?

You know what kind of people I’m looking for, and I trust your opinion.

This interaction is packed with excellent recruiting execution. Here are some things to note:

He stays in contact with agents who have left his office.

“Boomerang hires” are invaluable because they demonstrate to others in your office that the grass is not greener somewhere else.

He asks his competitors for referrals.

It’s surprising, but competitors will often give you referrals if they have a clear vision of the value you provide.

He builds trust by acknowledging the trustworthiness of the other person.

This is a great way to honor the relationship and lay the groundwork for future interactions.

After hearing “I trust your opinion,” the prospect felt safe enough to engage in additional conversation for the next 30 minutes.

The best recruiting conversations are built on trust and mutual respect.

Showing and acknowledging that trust is often the catalyst for making these conversations happen.

 

The Simple Psychology of Real Estate Recruiting [2nd Edition]

Unlock the secrets of effective real estate recruiting. Revised to include actionable frameworks for sharper execution and to help you turn psychological theory into a repeatable recruiting system.

Focus Less on What Your Competitors Offer

Focus Less on What Your Competitors Offer

While candidates will naturally consider other alternatives (commonly what a competitor is offering), it’s the least important issue for getting them to make a change. During the interview and follow-up conversations, don’t make the mistake of focusing too much time and energy on what your competitors are offering.