The Secret to Attracting More Recruiting Prospects

by | Apr 3, 2026

The best recruiting successes are built on attraction.

And the dance is more enjoyable when the recruiting prospect self-activates and pursues you.

So how do you make yourself attractive?

According to Harvard researchers, there is a simple thing anyone can do to tip the attraction scale in their favor.

Just ask more questions, especially follow-up questions.

We identified a robust and consistent relationship between question-asking and liking.

People who ask more questions, particularly follow-up questions, are attracted to and better liked by their conversation partners.

Simple–everyone knows this, right?

Not according to the researchers:

We also found that, despite the persistent and beneficial effects of asking questions, people do not anticipate that question-asking increases interpersonal liking.

This is a quick, easy, and decisive way to differentiate yourself.

While your competitors are busy talking about themselves, you can be asking questions.

There’s not much competition for this role, and it will subtly make you the most attractive person in a prospect’s recruiting journey.

Here’s a simple rule of thumb:  In any conversation, the other person should be doing at least 70% of the talking.

 

The Simple Psychology of Real Estate Recruiting [2nd Edition]

Unlock the secrets of effective real estate recruiting. Revised to include actionable frameworks for sharper execution and to help you turn psychological theory into a repeatable recruiting system.

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According to a nationwide survey of more than 1,900 agents, those who consider themselves “experts” at generating leads earn nearly four times as much as agents who struggle with this activity. It’s probably safe to say, the same principle holds true for recruiting.

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But if you’ve been around long enough, you know the business and real estate world doesn’t allow us to indulge in this comfort. It requires us to adjust or be left behind. It also rewards those who recognize that the connection between people, systems, and opportunities needs constant adjustment.

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To keep yourself from getting caught in this trap, do the hard work of creating and maintaining a large and vibrant recruiting database. Poor prospects don’t look so great when you have lots of other choices.